Here’s the thing, we are all going to die. Yet, the majority of adults do not talk about death or dying. Because of this, we are not prepared when a major illness or death occurs. What if we talk about it? It won’t hasten death or invite it to happen, but it may create clarity, lessen stress, and reduce family squabbles. Talking about death and getting clear about what our wishes are is a gift to ourselves and those around us.

How do we begin? We begin by pushing past the taboo of speaking openly and frankly about death and dying. We lean into the discomfort of talking about our death. In doing so, we create authentic connections to others in our lives, and we allow ourselves to face end-of-life challenges already prepared. We also create comfort and lessen suffering around death.

 Waiting until we are at death’s door is not helpful. Leaving such important decisions to the last minute makes an already difficult time worse. If there are complex family dynamics, this conversation is imperative. A conversation about death and dying is not just for older adults. Adults at any age need to be clear about their wishes and then make them known. Interestingly, most adults say they would have an end-of-life conversation if someone else started. Hmmm…

So, now what? Why not practice talking about death when the stakes are low and the pressure is off? This is where I come in. I can facilitate an end-of-life conversation in an intimate setting over dinner. It can be between partners, generations of family members, friends, or any combination we want to create together. Let’s have the conversation!

A few ideas might be:

• Discussions about medical wishes and advance directives

• End-of-live care plans, funerals, and burial

• What someone would like to be remembered for

• Death in general